Monday, March 09, 2009

March 9, 2009

Last time, last fight with cancer, I never considered this.

Last time, it was just what I did as a matter of survival.

But asking for help all the time is exhausting.

And just like Art's body struggling to recover from each round of chemo, struggling harder than last time. I struggle too. Feeling more beaten down, finding it harder and harder to get back up.

It’s hard to be consistently vulnerable.


We hope he will come home tomorrow. His numbers are on the rise. Maybe I can rise with them.


  1. Anonymous12:54 PM

    I can't tell you how proud I was of you when you chose to let Art stay in the hospital a bit longer. Although you are giving an amazing imitation, you are NOT WonderWoman. So I was glad that you were able to consider your self. YOU are the biggest resource you and they have, but you need to give your batteries a chance to recharge or, to use your metaphor, give your well time to refill. Your children, and Art, will understand the lesson: no one can do or be everything for anyone, much less everyone. Seeing you save yourself for the most serious emergencies gives them confidence that you can be depended upon to have your energies available when you have to use them.
    Consider yourself hugged from afar.

  2. Funny, how caring for yourself is the hardest thing to do. Thanks for the encouragement!

  3. Anonymous7:00 PM

    Read every day and send you all the strength that I have. We are all wishing you strength and we are learning from you on this journey. You are one teacher that I will never forget. May you feel some sense of calm in the midst of this horrendous storm.
    Hugs to all,
    Cathy Mishkin