Sunday, December 13, 2009

December 14., 2009 Bad, Bad Mom

Wake up.
Pallas sick.
Too sick for school.
Have to leave her
Have client appointment.
A high paying client appointment.
No insurance = work when I can.
I tell her what I have to do.

After I am done
I try to call.
Phone does not pick up.
Neither does answering machine.
I give myself a dope punch.
Unplugged the phone so Langston could fax something
last night.
Forgot to plug it back in.
She can't call out .... at all!

Panic fills me.
I call a friend.
"Can you go over there and make sure she is OK?
I'm on my way."
Traffic on the highway makes me really, really tense.
I want to mow down the slow driving police car.
I arrive home, my friend's car is there.
I am shoving down the sobs.

Bad, bad mom.
Bad, bad mom.

My friend laughs!
"We can discuss many ways you can become a bad mom.
This is not one of them."
I still cry.

She is right.
Pallas never tried to call.
I am doing the best I can.

We are all growing up so fast.

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