© 2009
Starting today, every Tuesday I will post a tip on how you can help someone you love and who is in need. During this journey I discovered that help comes in many alternative ways, beyond bringing a meal.
If you want 24 more tips now, go to http://www.cancercrisistips.com/ and sign up and receive a list of 25 of the most helpful things people did for us!
All gestures of kindness are worthy, it's just that some are more helpful than others!
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TIP # 7
Take their car to have an oil change.
Both times when Art was sick, maintaining our daily lives was impossible, including keeping the car maintained...which was really low on my priority list! A neighbor called and asked "When was the last time you had your oil checked?" I couldn't answer him. He showed up the next day, took the key from its hiding place and returned the car later fully serviced!
It's funny but I didn't realize until it was done that the worry of the car had been on my mind!
Why the neighbor did it.
I am good with cars. I wanted to help. It was something I could offer and if she didn't need it then, I knew she'd need it later. We live in LA. Our cars are our way of getting around. All I could think of is what if it breaks down while she is driving Art to the cancer center!
Tip For Getting the Person To Let You Help
Remind them that this is not necessarily about them. Use humor! "I just thought what can I do today to make myself feel good about me? Will you help me do that?"
Art was the world's best speller. All errors are to give him something to do while he looks over my shoulder, laughing!
Have a googlem aim or yahoo account? Become a follower please (to the right). It will help when I approach literary agents!
© 2009 Kim Hamer
Hello Kim...thanks for responding on Facebook. If anything I wrote truly made a positive difference in carrying you thru, then I am so very thankful for that.
ReplyDeleteKim when I saw your video, it shocked me because you look like...well...me! I had to do a double take to make sure it wasn't me. I've sensed a resemblance in quite a few of your pictures on fb as well....I never ever noticed it before. Ever. Maybe it's just my eyes going dim....they're not what they once were. Yup, I wear glasses to sometime....other times I'm simply defiant (smile).
As I read about what you call your "dirty little secret," I was not at all shocked for some reason. I've been there and done that (the divorce) in the past. Before it was final, many thought we had the perfect marriage...best thing since "peanut butter and jelly" to many in our circle of relationships at church and beyond. They were in shock to learn that basically I was miserable and covering up. I do NOT condone divorce...but I detest begin fake even more. One thing to be private (which is where I believe you and I fit), but quite another to be out and out fake.
I'm please to report that I am re-married to my best friend in the whole world next to Jesus Himself. We even fight well...haha!! Yeah, I have to say, what you see is what cha get with Rich and I. The good, the bad, and the ugly. And there's plenty of all three to go around...
Again, if ever you want to unload to somewhere distant for an ear, I'm here. I'm so very glad that you have a bereavement group to which you belong for those who "get it" as you would say.
Love you, Kim...and pray you will stay in touch more than on facebook. Please shoot me a line if ever you desire at rejoicestudio@aol.com.
Blessings!
Donna