The OMG I Need to Help Tip #7

The OMG (oh my God) I Need to Help Tuesday Tip
© 2009

Starting today, every Tuesday I will post a tip on how you can help someone you love and who is in need. During this journey I discovered that help comes in many alternative ways, beyond bringing a meal.

If you want 24 more tips now, go to http://www.cancercrisistips.com/ and sign up and receive a list of 25 of the most helpful things people did for us!

All gestures of kindness are worthy, it's just that some are more helpful than others!
-----

TIP # 7

Take their car to have an oil change.
Both times when Art was sick, maintaining our daily lives was impossible, including keeping the car maintained...which was really low on my priority list! A neighbor called and asked "When was the last time you had your oil checked?" I couldn't answer him. He showed up the next day, took the key from its hiding place and returned the car later fully serviced!

It's funny but I didn't realize until it was done that the worry of the car had been on my mind!

Why the neighbor did it.
I am good with cars. I wanted to help. It was something I could offer and if she didn't need it then, I knew she'd need it later. We live in LA. Our cars are our way of getting around. All I could think of is what if it breaks down while she is driving Art to the cancer center!

Tip For Getting the Person To Let You Help
Remind them that this is not necessarily about them. Use humor! "I just thought what can I do today to make myself feel good about me? Will you help me do that?"

Art was the world's best speller. All errors are to give him something to do while he looks over my shoulder, laughing!

Have a googlem aim or yahoo account? Become a follower please (to the right). It will help when I approach literary agents!

© 2009 Kim Hamer

Tweet

June 29, 2009

I am a pheonix rising...

Daily I find the strength and pleasure in living this new life.

I do not discover it alone.

The words of friends and readers, the cards, the anomyous massge gift certificates all push me up and out of the ashes.

They say
You are brave.
You are amazing.
Be weak...we still love you.
Go easy, Kim, go easy.

Reminding me that in the deepest darkest hole, I have people pulling, tugging, digging in with prayers and hope and words and actions and love and....and....and...

The wisdom of the whole is greater than the wisdom of one

THANK GOD!!

Your words are sometimes the only thing that gets me through a day. Today, they make me laugh.

I am back in this moment.

I am back.

Thank you friends.
Thank you readers.
Thank you self.

Tweet

March 4, 2009

Art is back in the hospital.

I knew it would happen, its just well....the 1:00 am phone call to 911 was not part of the plan. The call to a dear friend to come stay with the kids was not part of the plan. The passing out. Been there, done that. Was so not part of the plan!

Poor guy.

Massive indigestion for an hour.

Followed by vomiting.

Followed by fainting and waking up to the confusion of me, saying "Honey? Honey?"

There was no panic. I knew what needed to happen.

I was the premidonna on the phone.

"Um, is there any way they take him to Cedar Sinai?"

"Oh and please, no sirens. My children are asleep and I'd like to keep it that way."

"Thanks so much for coming! Um, could you turn your radio down, please."

And I wanted to say "Can you walk on your tip toes? My kids will surely notice the clunking of your heavy boots." And "Fellows, please. Let's keep it at a whisper." (Ever notice, men don't whisper!)

They couldn't take us to Cedars, however, after they checked him out, they did offer to put him in the car for me.

The 10 (major freeway route in LA) is delightful at 2 am.

The ER room was even delightful. No gun shot wounds, heart aches or fall out from bar fights.

At 4 am the tested him.

Lying down. Blood pressure 98/60

Sitting up Blood pressure 90/60

Standing Blood pressure never gotten cuase he started to pass out again.

Congratulations honey! You get to to stay!

And for a parting gift, you Kim Hamer get this lovely bag with "Patient Belongings" written on it. Your absolute favorite!

What it should say is:

Caution:

Person carrying this bag is not stable.

Their loved one has just been admitted to the hospital.

To add to their anguish, we have inserted this little string, masquarading as a handle,

that will dig into their hand when they pick up the bag. Giving them phsyical discomfort to go along with their emotional comfort.

Please stand back at least 20 feet.

Another day in our lives. This one with humor, a touch of saddness and whole lot of resignation. This is our life but it is a life. I am grateful.

Tweet