I don't know! In my completely useless and highly inaccurate view of cancer, I just thought you get diagnosed, you get chemo, you get better. That was it. I had heard about the side effects of chemo but ya know, well, I had just heard about them. I had never seen them
The medical profession is not perfect. Chemo could kill him, an infection could kill him, the lymphoma could kill him. We believe it's all 100% fool proof. We believe it's an exact science. It's not. We know so little about the human body. We think we know so much. In 30 years, I have not doubt that we will look back on chemo and think it barbaric. I look at it in Art, rimming his eyes with red, evaporating all his energy to the point where he can't finish a complete full sentence before he drifts off into a chemo-induced sleep and I see the grossness of the drugs. Intellectually, I know it's making him better. Emotionally, it is killing the image of the man I knew. I trust that he will come back. Waiting is the most painful thing I have done in my life.